Hydraulic Floor Jack Revision

This technical writing project required me to find any published set of instructions and offer improvements for readability and design. The letter below explains my position on the original owner's manual with links to the original and my revision. 



Sherry Thornburg
3223 Red Dr.
Anywhere TX 77339
281-333-3333

Date: October 27, 2010

Wal-mart Stores Inc.
Box 2345
Bentonville, Arkansas 72716

Attention: Sam Walton

Improving Owner’s Manual F-345AWM

Introductory Summary
I recently purchased a floor jack from your store that included one of these manuals, F-345AWM MVP Super Lift, Hydraulic Floor Jack. I found problems with this owner manual’s legibility and design that should be brought to your attention. These problems impede the reader and create obstacles to the use of the manual. A format with design elements that smooth the look of the pages and increase legibility would make this a much more usable manual. 


Design Elements in need of Revising
Legibility: The first difficulty is that the manual was printed in what appears to be AvantGuarde and/or Arial font. While these are standards in website formatting, they are in fact difficult to read in print.  This is especially true when printed in a size less than 12 pt., which is the case in your illustrations and troubleshooting checklist. The use of all capitals, bold and not, in much of the manual also decreases legibility. The use of all capitals in print is commonly used for catching the eye, but becomes tiring to the eye when used in body text. Also, the thin type font used on a black background of the front cover, are faint and broken on my manual. This was likely due to the ink saturation being very dense during the print process.  Due to such variations in ink saturation it is best not to use such thin fonts over black backgrounds.

Design: It appears that the original designers attempted to avoid duplication of graphics by double labeling all graphics in two languages. This works with the graphics, but the need to have graphics near written instructions for illustration prompted the designers to use a two column format with English on the left and Spanish on the right. Readers are conditioned to consider information in a left column as leading to further information on the right. This manual does not follow that conditioning, causing confusion and a pattern of stops and starts in the reading process.

  
Conclusions and Recommendations
The use of sans-serif, in itself, needs to be changed to a more legible serif font such as Times New Roman, which is a standard in print material. All front cover fonts on the black background should be printed in a wider font. The use of all capitals in any area other than a heading should also be changed.  The booklet layout should be re-designed to avoid stops and starts in the reading process.  To that goal, I believe a bilingual format separating English and Spanish would be better.  This will only require the manual be one sheet larger and will promote a more helpful and efficient reading experience. I suggest a reverse flopped format with English on one side and Spanish on the other. 

Included is a revision sample for your consideration.  Your user manuals are very important sources of safety information and instructions for your customers. I believe you will find the changes I propose improvements that will render them more user friendly. 



Sincerely,





Sherry Thornburg

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